Drove half an hour out, and encountered this sign:
… but that didn’t stop me. (Also… I gotta say those little red dot teardrops are kind of cute)
Anyway… my trespassing ass crawled over that fence. If I wasn’t going to leave with a pumpkin, then I was going to sit on one. And then some.
I had some trouble jumping up…
So I grabbed a fuckin’ cinder block
… and I put that shit behind the pumpkin…
… and I climbed my bitch ass up
… and I had some trouble ok
but I kept trying
because I did not want to give up
and things were happening
and they were uncomfortable things
but they were things ok
and I finally made it, because of the not giving up
and then I was Queen
Queen Jessica Pumpkin
I just wanted everyone to see that last pic 3 times.
Ok so here we go.
Back to being Queen Jessica Pumpkin
I wanted to take things further
I was gaining even more confidence
… and even more
I just… why did I keep doing that with my face?
anyway… finally
I was really in my element
y’all canceled this patch but *this* patch isn’t canceled
if you know what I mean
and I hope you do not
regardless
So I kept going
I was like… let’s switch this shit up
but oh shit is someone looking
nope just cows
ok cool carry on
’bout to get freeky
… or spooky, if you will
fuck it I don’t care
you probably can’t tell but this *is* actually different shot
and there was much laughing
and more
take me Pumpkin King I am your Queen and things
and then I was like jesus my back
but then ok let’s make this pumpkin my bitch
holy shit it’s really getting hot now
just look at my arm
reaching up into the…. sky
I guess
Really not sure where I was going with this one
gonna grab my own ass hell yeah
I mean who else is going to grab it I’m alone
oh shit where’s my hand now bitch
getting ready for a super sexy picture now
I have failed
I don’t know why I’m like this, but I put the cinder block back when I was done
that’s all I guess
thanks for watching my transformation from Jessica to Queen Jessica Pumpkin
Love you.
<3